Craving the Supernatural

After Karen's book and blogging about it, I'm still here. Still dealing with my anger...I should probably say "working through" it since dealing with seems to imply stagnation. "Working through" is exactly what I'm doing. Digging deep, wondering what's at the source. Karen was so right in calling it an "insidious sin." It eats at the very fabric of our lives, tearing relationships apart, rendering us useless...

What I'm unearthing is some kind of ugly. :-DLoaded with self. I realized the other night that I'm desperately seeking Ronie...validation of Ronie. So, I prayed and asked God to help me be completely satisifed with HIS validation--that I'm his daughter, that He has completely accepted me. No matter what else--if anything--I do. I'm already accepted. He already loves me. Sweet!

In church on Sunday, the gist of the Sunday school message was: What if God's purpose for [insert whatever you're going through], is greater than you? Can you still embrace God's purpose even though it might not mean the answer you want? If what you had your heart set on, the road you paved--is backhoed.

YEEE-OUCH!! My toes aren't merely bandaged...they're in a cast. LOL With all the things in my life that seem to be crushed or stunted dreams (a major source of my anger), that was an especially painful question. I've been thinking and praying, seeking God, asking Him to let the Holy Spirit teach me how to embrace His purpose. I mean...come on--it's as painful as hugging a porcupine!!

Well, this morning, I woke up in a bad mood (man, that was really hard to admit LOL). So, I read the Word, and a song kept rolling through my mind. It's from the band ECHOING ANGELS, and it's their title cut: YOU ALONE. ((If you check out their site (see link above), you'll get to HEAR THE SONG.)) Sadly, I only got this album last week, so I didn't know all the words. So, after reading, I stuffed my headphones on, closed my eyes, and worshiped--all the while listening to the lyrics. Check them out:

You Alone

Chris Peevy and Scotty Wilbanks

Desperately wanting to just find a way
Searching and seeking for someone to say
That its alright and its ok
Like I know you can

That its alright and its ok
Like I know you can

You alone are God
I am yours and you are mine
And I know the heavens will call out your name
If I don't

I close my eyes
And I drift away
To a place I remember
To a place I feel safe
Where its alright and its ok
Cause I'm there in your arms

Where its alright and its ok
Cause I'm there in your arms

You alone are God
I am yours and you are mine
And I know the heavens will call out your name (repeat)

Bridge
You forgive me You accept me Just as I am And you love me And you want me To understand

Chorus

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